He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
