They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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