my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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