Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
