After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
