Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
