That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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