He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
