Please don't use social media to get back at me.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize