just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
