In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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