You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize