I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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