i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
