it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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