She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Panties = found
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