Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
