so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize