Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
