Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
