i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
My vagina is officially offended.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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