i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Randomize
