I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
