My nipple is on Facebook.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
