And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
