ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
