I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
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