You made me cry and you don't even care
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
