I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
