you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
