I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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