You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Randomize
