Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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