we have officially lost it.
Small penises have feelings too.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
