If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize