I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
