chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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