i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I supernannyed him into submission
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
