mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
