Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
