That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize