I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
