and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
