I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
