Sponge bath it is.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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