This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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