No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
