and you said cock pushups were impossible
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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