Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
