it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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