I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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