I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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